What's So Weird About ASMR?

ASMR, or autonomous sensory meridian response, is a relaxing, tingly sensation, usually triggered by auditory or visual stimuli. ASMR also refers to the genre of online content made to evoke this sensation. Early ASMR content creators, also known as ASMRtists, started out on YouTube in 2009, making whispered videos with cellphone cameras and earbud microphones. While this was the start of intentional ASMR, the sensation itself is nothing new. I distinctly remember the wonderful head tingles I got playing school with friends when I was a little kid. I didn’t know it at the time, but that was probably one of the first times I experienced ASMR. In sixth grade, I was drowning in stress and anxiety so I turned to the internet for help—I began listening to relaxing music and guided meditations on YouTube. Eventually, an ASMR video popped up in my YouTube feed. After unwittingly seeking out all of this unintentional ASMR, I finally found what I really wanted—content specifically designed to trigger that tingly sensation I had felt so many times as a kid. I was hooked immediately—I dove head first into a world of diverse ASMRtists and infinite tingly triggers. Since those early days in middle school, I have used ASMR almost daily to calm my anxiety, boost my mood, relax before bed and to keep me focused while doing schoolwork. ASMR has truly improved my quality of life, so why was I so afraid to tell anyone about it? 

Like many online communities, there is a more “adult” side to ASMR, which fuels many of the misconceptions surrounding the concept. Certain ASMRtists have found a profitable niche in creating ASMR with sexual undertones. Other “ASMRtists” favor sexually explicit content with just a hint of ASMR. What started as an entirely wholesome genre of content has gained a misleadingly sexual reputation. A vast range of innocent and sexual content can be found on YouTube. For inexperienced viewers, navigating this dichotomy can be tricky, with potentially scarring consequences. I have learned the hard way to avoid certain triggers, which have been adopted by this more adult side of the ASMR community. My love for ASMR came before this convergence of sexual content and relaxation, so these instances failed to disuade me. But for a new viewer, one wrong click could completely color their perspective on ASMR. Negative comments often come from viewers like these, and others who haven’t bothered to give the genre a chance. Misinformation spreads like wildfire and a shocking percentage of the internet seems to believe that ASMR is inherently sexual if not also creepy. 

In reality, the majority of ASMR content is not remotely sexual—most ASMRtists strictly promote relaxation, anxiety relief, sleep aid, positive thinking and other non-sexual topics. While select viewers still sexualize this content, it is reflective of their own misconceptions, rather than the actions of these ASMRtists. In fact, many of these content creators filter their comment sections to keep their community safe for minors and adults like me who are just here to relax. It’s also important to note that this is not unique to ASMR—the gaming community, for example, has plenty of creators who sexualize their content. There is nothing wrong with creating ASMR content with sexual appeal, but ASMR as a whole should not be branded as such. 

The intimate nature of ASMR contributes to these misconceptions. Stumbling onto your first ASMR video is an unfortunately jarring experience for the typical internet user. As I had eased into ASMR from watching adjacent content, like guided meditations, I never experienced the shock that new viewers must feel. Most YouTube content is completely impersonal, and it’s hard to forget that you are just one subscriber among many. Entertainment doesn’t need to be personal, and in most cases, the virtual crowd contributes to the excitement. ASMR, on the other hand, is curated towards relaxation, rather than entertainment. Think back to your most relaxing memories—you were probably somewhere peaceful, where you felt comforted and cared for by close friends and family. This is the exact sort of environment that ASMRtists seek to create. Many ASMRtists simulate one-on-one settings where they address the viewer as an individual, rather than a member of the audience. Many of the most popular triggers fall under the category of “personal attention,” which contributes to the sense of intimacy. Intimate experiences with strangers are generally uncomfortable and unwelcome. This is especially true online, where our interactions with others are the most anonymous, and the most public. This discomfort, coupled with the drastic shift from typical internet content, turns many potential viewers away from ASMR.

ASMR might be different from what you’re used to finding on the internet, but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. I think of ASMR as a virtual massage—it’s an intimate experience with someone who is likely a stranger, and yet it can be incredibly relaxing. Being unexpectedly caressed by a stranger would surely be uncomfortable, if not outright terrifying, but most people do enjoy receiving treatments from massage therapists. Likewise, people who are put off by unexpected experiences with ASMR, might find that they enjoy it if they are willing and informed. In my experience, ASMR videos can come very close to replicating the experience of receiving an actual massage, reiki session, or facial. If you’ve been wanting a spa treatment for a while, but can’t spare funds or time, listening to ASMR might tide you over for a while.

Even in ideal contexts, not everyone enjoys massages—some people are too ticklish and others are justifiably uncomfortable with that level of intimacy, even from people they know personally. ASMR isn’t for everyone either, and that’s okay. Some people are physically incapable of experiencing ASMR, which is completely out of their control. Some people prefer offline methods of relaxation, and others might just find all ASMR unpleasant. Even I dislike certain ASMR triggers—I am really bothered by eating sounds, for example. But it’s important to remember that this is subjective—I dislike this trigger, but other people enjoy it and that’s fine with me. Even if ASMR isn’t your thing, it’s not okay to spread misinformation or to put down ASMRtists and listeners who just want to spread good vibes. Ultimately, the stigma surrounding ASMR is uncalled for and unfortunate. If ASMR wasn’t so misunderstood, a lot of people would be a lot more relaxed. 

The ASMR community is as diverse as any other corner of the internet. There are creators of all ages, genders, and backgrounds, with a variety of different styles. From classic triggers like tapping, whispering, and raindrops, to obscure historical roleplays, the creativity of the ASMR community never fails to impress and relax me. Nobody should feel obligated to give ASMR a chance, but I do believe there’s something out there for almost everyone. I’m grateful for having found ASMR and I’m sure that a lot of people would benefit from giving it a try.